danyadarling

Mature readers only.

People are infatuated by cops. Look at the unending slew of cop shows. One of my favorite when I was younger was the show, Cops. I watched this one a lot when I was a pre-teen. I watched it because I didn’t see a lot of my dad then and I was particularly needing a father figure in my life so I figured this show was the closest thing to him. He was in the deep throws of his career in the DEA and often times under cover. The war on drugs did not stop at 5 o’clock.

Personally, I loathe cop and law and order shows. To me, they are so above and beyond what really happens. On top of that, I see them preying on women’s fears. Most homicides are not the pretty girl next door. No, they are usually victims of just a bad drug deal or prostitutes whose deaths do not stir up good society. Most homicides are ugly and raw and never make the news.

This was the case at least in St. Louis in the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s. Most still don’t. St. Louis has boasted some of the nation’s worst crime statistics. It was a hard place to live and to grow up. Strangers didn’t talk to each other much less say, “Hi” on the street. Even cops didn’t trust each other fully unless they knew each other well and had established trust. That was the law of my family as well. This ferocious sense of privacy may contribute to the lack of real understanding of cops despite the public’s obsession with law enforcement. And to be perfectly honest, I am breaking this code of absolute secrecy by writing. Yes, I feel the guilt and paranoia panting deep inside my heart. 

Among our community, it’s said that cops kids either turn out to be okay or pretty fuc*ed up. One of my dad’s buddy’s kids spent a few hazy years working the pole and entertaining private customers for money. During this time, we used to get calls for her from ever—chasing men at 3 or 4 in the morning. Her dad turned a special shade of red when the calls came for her from mysterious men at odd hours. She ended up having a mixed baby out of wedlock, which was about the worst thing she could have done to her dad. I’ll spare some other details about other cop’s kids. 

 It’s very common for cop’s kids to have problems with the law, have drug and/or alcohol problems, become abusive or get into multiple abusive relationships, have depression and anxiety, and on and on. This was my experience with other cop’s kids anyway.  Those who made it to adulthood consider it a triumph. 

Top 10 Rates Cops Series:  my only favorite from this list is The Wire. 

1. The Wire

2. The Shield

3. Law & Order Special Victims Unit

4. Law & Order

5. NYPD Blue

6. Hill Street Blues

7. NCIS

8. Criminal Minds

9. Columbo

10. Southland